How To Deal With Unwelcome Tips
You often get many unwelcome tips when you are expecting your first child. We will share how you handle unwelcome tips without losing your temper.
During pregnancy, parents are forced to try to cope with a tidal wave of advice from friends and family. Sometimes they can even overwhelm you with recommendations, especially if they go against the advice you have received from the doctor.
“The baby is not safe”, “Do not let him crawl”, “Eat whenever you want and whatever you want”, “Do not let him cry”, “Do not breastfeed, it is better to bottle feed so you can sleep”, etc.
These are just some of the intense and erroneous reminders that new parents receive. Mother-in-law, sisters, mothers and friends overwhelm them with experiences and recommendations that the parents have not asked for.
Another thing that is quite common is the typical “wise” parent who thinks that he or she knows everything about raising children and is convinced that everyone else is wrong.
What’s wrong with receiving unwelcome tips?
When we become parents, we must adapt to a new reality, face fears, doubts and challenges. If we are then also forced to deal with unwelcome tips, the proposals may actually overwhelm us.
It becomes even more complicated if we compare medical information to the tips we receive from our loved ones, and even worse if we do not know how to behave in front of our loved ones, either because we are afraid of hurting someone or because we want to avoid quarrel.
In fact, there are various ways to deal with unwelcome tips. Here are four options that can help you resolve this complex and stressful situation.
4 ways to deal with unwelcome tips
Are you looking for the right way to handle unwelcome tips? Are you afraid of what might happen if you do not accept them?
Do not worry! Here are some ways to respond:
- Express yourself. Share your opinion and knowledge. It is not wrong to express that you do not agree with their advice, or to make it clear that you will not use their suggestions. Nothing bad will happen if you maintain a respectful dialogue.
Explain the reasons why you have decided not to follow the advice. It shows that you are listening to what they are saying, but that it goes against the information you have taught yourself, without making them angry.
You can also listen to the recommendation, say thank you and also that you will discuss the matter the next time you visit the pediatrician.
- Evaluate. Even though you may get angry, keep in mind that it may be good to have advice that you have not asked for. Accepting useful, wise, and constructive suggestions from others does not hurt, and sometimes it teaches you to solve problems and be more practical.
Therefore, do not strive to go against all advice just because you have not asked for it. It is important to be open and listen to information that may be important for when raising the child.
- Smile. Even if you may feel annoyed by the unwelcome advice, it is recommended that you respond with “thank you, I’ll think about it” and with a smile on your face. You will thus not have to walk around with unnecessary feelings of guilt and the person who has given you advice will feel satisfied.
Remember who the mother is. No matter what advice you receive, always remember that you are the mother of the child and that you can bring up what you consider to be the best.
Always choose the best for your children; follow what your heart says is right and ignore the rest.
Receiving advice that you have not asked for can be annoying, but it is important to reflect on the intention of the council: Did the person give the council good intentions or just to criticize?
When you know that, you also know how to behave, how to handle unwelcome tips and what to do when your relatives decide to give advice that you have not asked for.
Take a deep breath and be thankful that you are surrounded by people who care about you and your child.
In the end, no one knows what is best for your child more than yourself.